Let’s sit with that for a minute,
What does it mean?
How do we do it?
So often through this journey,
I have needed to express what is going on for me,
It’s a bloody hard journey,
A beautiful and mind blowing one,
A scary as hell,
And it feels like a miracle,
Being able to express these parts of this journey,
Has been overwhelming difficult for me,
Every time I express my challenges,
I feel guilt for even feeling like that,
I feel like I ‘should’ be feeling one way or another,
Especially when the most common comment is,
‘Well, you do have two in there’!
I can’t even begin to explain how hard that is to comprehend,
How scary that feels,
And how incredible that feels,
It’s made me think,
What are you doing when someone is talking to you?
When they are expressing good or challenging parts of their journey,
Are you trying to fix them?
Are you comparing them?
Are you reassuring them?
All things that no doubt we feel are right,
And all things I do myself,
I am the first to say,
‘What about this’?
‘It will be OK’,
‘You need to trust’,
‘I heard this person did this, why don’t you try that’?
What I’m learning right now,
Is that these comments,
This need to fix and help,
Can do quite the opposite,
It can make us feel as though our emotions are not valid,
Like we are being a drama queen,
Like we are not seeing our situation as we should be,
I recently had a beautiful soul,
Hold space for me,
Down at the supermarket,
In an everyday ‘bump into’ situation,
And it changed things for me,
It made me feel incredible,
I walked away feeling like it was OK to be sad,
It was OK to not feel grateful in that moment,
It was OK to be scared,
It was OK to trust in myself,
It was OK to know I could do it,
I felt so empowered,
To be able to allow my emotions to be what they were,
No need to change them,
Or fix them,
Or compare them,
What that then creates is space,
Space for you to move through your emotions,
At your own pace,
Without the ‘need’ to,
And when you allow an emotion to have the space it needs,
You can move through it,
Without bottling it,
And it therefore only getting worse the next time it arises,
I am blown away with how present this pregnancy is teaching me to be,
All I can handle is one moment at a time,
Recognizing the emotion that is there and accepting it,
Then taking the next moment and the next emotion,
One day at a time I have said the whole way,
It’s now reached one moment at a time,
This last journey into the depths of what I can achieve with my body and mind is no doubt going to be challenging and beautiful all at once,
So one moment at a time