On this day,

Two years ago,

I cried,

 

As I looked in the mirror,

I cried to myself,

To my husband,

 

I told him I did not wish to celebrate,

‘There is nothing to celebrate’,

I said from deep down,

 

My life was not worth celebrating,

My life where I have been,

My life of where I am going,

My future,

My lack of achievements,

My present moment,

 

None of it worth celebrating.

 

It took every ounce of strength,

To go out that night with my family,

Unbeknowns to them,

The deep,

Devastating state that I was in,

 

Two years on,

My birthday is a 3 day affair,

 

I am so fucking proud of where I am today,

I am so proud of what I have achieved,

I can see my life as amazing,

Every. Last. Bit.

 

I can see my exciting future,

I actually get goosebumps about what I am striving for,

I can feel the support,

I can feel the love,

I can feel the drive.

 

I have opened up my soul this year like nothing before,

I have brought in so much pain,

So I could release it,

 

The trauma I have relived was short,

Compared with the light and love that was given in return,

 

It has been the hardest year of my life,

Looking back,

Even I’m scared of the dark places I was taken,

But in the same breathe,

I marvel,

I marvel at the strength WE have,

I marvel at OUR ability to heal the traumas of our past,

I feel excited to share,

Our past can be released,

I am an example of how YOU can LET GO!!!!!

 

I am so excited to be celebrating my birthday this year for all that I am, all that I have been and all that I will be!!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MENTAL MUMMA!!!!

 

All my love and strength, xo